- Category: Personal Commentary
- Published: Monday, 01 July 2013 18:48
- Written by Richard W. Lutman
Let's face it. When it come to pursuing someone of romantic interest, even at the best of times it can be a challenging task. Even more so when our means to communicate is made more difficult by our stutter.
In my years working in social services I have been able to observe human behavior in many different retrospections. When it comes to taking chances of any kind, there is risk involved. But in many ways, pursuing a romantic interest holds a greater fear for those of us that stutter.
Verbal communication is the main way we communicate with others. So how do we, as people who stutter, overcome our fear? Hear are a few strategies that may be of assistance:
- Technology is a great way to meet someone, whether it be the online dating scene or Facebook. Working into the online conversation that you have a stutter is a graceful way to let the other party know before meeting. The downside to this is you are not always able to grasp there true reaction online. However some people that stutter find this an easier way to take the initial tension off at the first meeting.
- In the initial meeting, telling the person right off the bat you have a stutter can be an effective means to get it out and proceed on with any awkwardness. Whether you do this or not will boil down to your comfort level.
- Humor is the strategy I often use. For me this a great way to reduce tension, and take the attention away from the stutter. The down side is that you run the risk of the joke not being perceived well. But if the person has a sense of humor they will see past it and laugh. If they don't its s good way to gage someone.
- Letting the person find out on there own. This for many is the easiest way.
At the end of the day, whether we choose to tell the person up front or not it boils down to what makes us comfortable. For there is no right or wrong in doing this. For each of us, establishing that connection and finding that person will be as unique as we are. For when the time comes that we do find that person our stutter won't matter to them, and that person will make us feel at ease with ourselves. This will be how we know when that special individual has arrived in our lives. For many like myself its been the journey in finding that person that has taught me the most. Not only about myself, but also other people. For we must acknowledge that there is beauty and grace in all of us regardless of any challenges one might have.